why all this happen me.....WHY?!?!?

time flies...
yea
i'm gonna enter segi college soon..
after all waiting & disappointment...
trying hard to apply to all the goverment u....
jz to save $$$
& waiting for the result out
at last after 3 to 4 month
''DUKACITA DIMAKLUMKAN BAHAWA.......''
then now at last i enter segi
wan to stay at my aunt hostel
trying to be more independent...
i'hv save my $$$for it
but wad my dad say..?
he thought i'hv save lotsa $$$4k
how i can save tht much $$$ jz working for a part time job??!!
why he couldn't understand me...
blame me tht why i resign for the job at spring...
i'm planning to join the airline course already so i resign...
at last...i din join...so no work jz work for pc fair & a few road show...
thts all....
when i do my things...do he care?
do he ask wad am i doing & giving me advise...?
now i register already then he start to say me
why i do this & tht...i'm TOTALLY lose u knw..
even say me didn't discuss with him...but why didn't u ask..?
keep silent all the time....
i scare i stepped the wrong path & feel regret for whole life...
i knw some of their parent's care & arrange all the best for their son or daughtors
but me?
who give me the direction...?WHO??
and some don't even need to worry about money?
but me again hv to suffer all this...so as my sis...
was thinking of moving to my aunt hostel...
but my aunt also not the rich one..
i also plan want to find jobs at Hills
but can i carry all responsibility for my own
my daily expenses like eat & sch sometimes will also hv activities...
i jz save 1k++...
i told dad...
i guess he think whole night already..
this morning then told me don't go hostel...
daily expenses is too heavy especially eat..
how bout my transport?
he said using bus again....my life could not be escape from BUS...
& this is my life....no once could understand me....
dad still wondering why i don't wanna join the nursing course at sg
yet all the fees is free including daily expenses is provided..
but the contract? hv to work for them for 6 yrs salary / month RM5k++
but i don't even interested to the course...be a nurse i cant imagine how my life would be...& 6 yr not 6 month....i cant accept it although i no need to worry about money.....and i register at segi ord...so i wont & don't make me confuse again...PLS..='(
Monday i start class....hope everything's go smoothly...
i'm gonna find another part time jobs again...wadever jobs...
i know life shouldn't be suckss...
but my life is totally suckss..!!
when can i get through it???
sometimes crying alone is just the only way to make me feel better...
thtts all tht i can do...